Sunday, December 30, 2007


Well this is a version of the item that has been accepted for publication. I made it for my very best girlfriend back home for Christmas. I hope she really liked it. I know she said she did but ya just never know. I thought I would post a quick update, it's been pretty tense around the house with the holidays and what not, but I'm managing. I haven't felt like doing much lately, I can tell you that for sure! But then again that isn't anything new really........LOL I do have to tell everyone that I did get a job, I just don't know if I'm going to be able to make it only making $7.00 and hour, without a set schedule. It will have to do for now, but it's still really scary. It's with Starbucks and the manager hired me over the phone, from that very first interview that I had, so I'm hoping she has good things in mind for me. I'm praying really hard. I am going to go down to Fed-ex tomorrow and see if they have anything posted, they pay over $11 an hour and they even have tuition reimbursement. That would work really well, plus they have a set schedule. Days or nights. Hoping for something during the day though. I also wanted to take a minute and wish everyone a Happy New Year, I wish for each and everyone of your dreams and desires to come true. I'm really hoping that 2008 will prove to be the beginning of a new road to travel for myself and my family. Be safe, and have a great night.
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Sunday, December 23, 2007


I don't think I have posted this card yet, but I was getting tired of the Christmas cards.........so I thought I would look and see what I had on the computer all ready. I'm feeling in the mood to go stamp, but the problem is my basement is a total disaster!!! I probably have a 4x4 spot on my table to create on.........LOL Then of course I still need to clean house and bake. Just not in the mood for the cleaning......but then again who is.
I was sitting here and I realized that after almost 11 years of being a Stampin' UP! demonstrator I will have to give up being a demo. I can't make my minimum for this quarter, and so that means in January I would need to place a $600 order.........Not happening. It's like a part of my body is being ripped off.........LOL I just can't imagine not getting everything in the mail, all the sneak peeks, and the discount.........I'm going to be lost. I have a huge downline, all 3rd level and below, my 2nd level downline is an amazing woman. I just could never find another recruit. Stampin' UP! has been a part of my life for so long, and I guess with the divorce going on and having to give up SU! it just seems like 2 major life changes for me, and let me tell you it's depressing! Even though I knew John and I needed to go our own ways, and be friends, it's much harder emotionally then I thought it ever would be. I think if he wasn't in the house with me it might be easier on me, but with me not having a job at the moment it's pretty hard to have 2 rent payments on 1 income. I'm still really struggling with the whole job situation. I'm keeping my fingers crossed for the Starbucks thing still. I'm calling another manager at the mall Starbucks on Wed. or Thur. if I don't hear from the new location, because she said that she would really like to get me in with the company. Praying praying praying. Speaking of that, we couldn't go to church this morning because my hair dryer went on the fritz.........what's up with that? And let me tell you hair dryers aren't very cheap anymore, I couldn't find one for less then 20 bucks, but hey I can't go without a hair dryer, it's scary scary sight. LOL
Well that's enough rambling, I hope you all have a wonderful Christmas and enjoy your families.
I'm going to really try to get the basement cleaned up, I have a design team that I'm going to apply for so keeping my fingers crossed for that too!!!
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Thursday, December 20, 2007

Non Christmas

Top is the outside and the bottom pic is the inside
I really like how this card turned out, it's nice to have a few cards for those guys in your life, already done up. I know for me it's too much pressure to try and come up with a manly card on the spot. What about you guys??? I had this card saved so I thought I would put it up, since I hadn't put much up lately. I just got a bunch of new spring/Valentine's Day stamps, and I ordered a couple other winter sets, I think I'm still going to be making some snowy cards. Thats pretty much what the weather around here puts me in the mood for.
It seems like most of the other bloggers kids are already out for Christmas break, but mine have 1 last day to go. Don't ask me what on earth I'm going to do with all 3 of them home for 17 days.....Ugggg, John will be home for 4 of those days, but geez that's a long time. I don't really have a clue what I should do with them, what on earth do 10 yr. old boys like to do anymore these days? They can't just sit in front of the TV the whole time, as much as they would love it?? Any suggestions???
Hope your close to having all your Holiday tasks accomplished.................Hmmmm Let me think, do I? I'm sure I'll think of something I have forgotten to do. Cya
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Tuesday, December 18, 2007

WOW what a great day!

First off the day didn't start out looking too bright for me........but I tried to keep my head above water............I managed. I had an interview with Starbucks and I think it went really really well, especially since the girl that interviewed me told me that if I didn't hear back from 1 of the 2 locations they were currently hiring for in about 2 weeks to contact her because she would love to hire me for her location!!! WoooHooo I'm so excited about that! Then I was at the PO and found out they are planning to hire 3 new people for the office in a couple of months, so I will definitely be putting in my app for that job.................But I honestly think the best part of the whole day was the e-mail that I got when I got home..............It was from Paper Crafts magazine, and a submission that I made for the 1st time way back in May under the general submissions got accepted for publishing..............I'm totally floored, I thought for sure since it had been so long it was a no go, in fact I forgot that I even submitted it really. I am just jumping up and down. I can't believe it. Talk about a serious EGO boost. I definitely feel like stamping now..................Anyone know of any companies looking for participants in their design team?? I'm feelin' pretty confident right about now!!! LOL
Thanks for sharing in all my excitement. Have a great night.

Wow a Christmas Card




Well I figured I better hurry up and get the last few pictures of my Christmas cards posted before the holiday passes by. This card actually came together rather nice. I'm very happy with it. You can't really tell but the Holly Berries on the wreath have red stickles on it. I still haven't even mailed out my cards yet. I am so horrible, who in their right mind makes their Christmas cards and never gets them sent out. I did that last year, so I'm really going to make myself go finish stuffing the envy's. I even have the postage stamps.
I could make many excuses, but really who am I fooling, I'm not even working right now. Too much time makes for too much thinking I think.....LOL

Wow I made myself make the phone call that's been needing to be made, WOOHOOO for me. I get a gold star. Sorry about the sarcasm, I guess that seems to be about the only way I can get through everything.
I think part of my problem with my creative mojo is that even though I'm trying to be busy when I go to the basement to stamp, my mind tends to wonder. Just can't seem to keep focused, and let me tell you it sucks!

I hope you all are ready for Christmas, of course I'm not, especially since when my dad was here visiting, he took each of the kids Christmas shopping, and Josh ended up buying 3 of the same things that we had bought him. Ugggg so that means returns to Toys R Us, and I thought I was so done with that crazy place. And of course I have no clue what else to buy him. Any suggestions for a 10 almost 11 year old boy?? Help.

Have a great day, and hoping that everyone is ahead of the Christmas rush, and your able to enjoy the last week before Christmas.

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Saturday, December 15, 2007

Saturday

It feels like it's going to be a long day today. It's snowing, and yes it's pretty but it's cold, and if it snows too much I won't be able to go to church, and I really think I need to go. It' s been a long week. Stressful, emptying, confusing, oh I'm sure there are so many more adjectives I could use, it just doesn't seem like I have the strength. We all had dinner with my dad last night before we went to the movies, and it was so hard to say goodbye. I guess I don't ever really think about my dad that much, when he isn't here, because he's not always been a big part of my life. But when I see him it brings back so many different memories, especially about my step mom, I think it makes it even rougher.

Payton and I stopped at the Christian book store today, and I got a new bible, and a cheater book to help me while I'm reading. A new online friend of mine told me that the book of John was a good book to start with so Payton and I are reading it and then were going to discuss it together. I think doing something like this with Payton will be something special that her and I can continue on for a long time, and keep us close, besides I'm probably going to need her help anyways......LOL Payton actually snickered at me when I looked a the big print bibles, but I ended up with a regular print. Little booger :) I did get tabs so that I could find the books a bit easier.

When I was bluffering the internet today, Kitchen sink was offering blog candy and all you had to do was leave a comment saying what your favorite treat for Christmas was.........Divinity immediately came to my mind. I haven't had that for so long, my grandma use to make it, I can't even tell you how long it's been, my Grandma has been gone for 14 yrs, and after posting that comment it dawned on me that Monday would have been her birthday, she would have been 75. It seems like she's been gone forever some days and then other's it seems like she was just sitting beside me talking to me. Happy Birthday Grandma I love you!

Ok I promise tomorrow I will try and post a card or at least something, I still have to get my BFF Christmas box done and ready to mail by Monday.......especially since it has stuff from Halloween in it too. Can you tell I'm not real good at getting my act together! Have a great night, and stay warm, keep your fingers crossed that we don't get the predicted 10 in. of snow.

Thursday, December 13, 2007

Time on my hands

I guess posting is what happens when you have so much time on your hands, but like I just told a new friend of mine this morning--some days I don't even know where the time has gone. It's like I get up in the morning, and before I know it the kids are all home from school. Other's it seems like the day goes on forever. The weather here is ugly and gray and rainy. I don't think that really helps my mood. The holidays are always hard because my extended family and friends are all so far away. Usually my mom comes for Christmas, but we decided this year might not be such a great idea, with everything that's going on. Now I suppose I regret that, I could really use my mom right now. It just sort of seems like I'm floating along. I try really hard to not let the kids see any of it, but sometimes it's just really difficult to hide.

Who would have thought getting a divorce could be so emotional, especially when it's me that wants it. I guess maybe the fact that John and I are being really nice to each other, and trying to not step on each other's toes since he's still at the house makes it even more difficult. Hmmm that use to be the way it was with us, we could really talk, and be friends, but that had all disappeared, but suddenly it's back again. I don't really understand it all.

I just keep praying for direction in all of this. I started reading a book that a friend sent me a long time ago, and of course then it was of no interest, but now that's a different story. It's called "A little pot of oil" It's about how when you feel like your running on empty, your suppose to ask God to fill you up and help you out. I feel strange asking God to help me, when there are so many other people that need help and prayers more then me. It's strange how my thinking has changed in some ways, and then others I wonder why I think the way I do. So many questions, and no answers.

Unfortunately I don't even feel like stamping, and I really hate that feeling. It's like my head is saying go stamp it will make you feel better, but then I get down there and can't seem to accomplish anything. Oh how that bothers me!!! Grrrrr

I'm pretty sure there's laundry calling my name, so at least I can say I accomplished something! LOL

Wednesday, December 12, 2007

Wow 2 posts in a row, in 2 days.........

Hot dog I'm on it.........LOL Nothing like bragging about your self, now is there. Lets see first the card-----Gotta love those Verve visiual sets, Especially now that they will be clear, and there is not cutting. Juliee is the greatest, I just love those stamps. Very simple easy card to make. Those scallop punches, can't live without them, but those nestabilitties sure would be great too..........In my wildest dreams unless I hit the jackpot.........or lottery, and that's going to be pretty darn difficult I think since I don't play. Oh well. I really appreciate the comments on my post yesterday. All of them were so sweet, I really wish those of you that comment though, would leave an e-mail of some sort so that I can respond back to you, I would love to be able to tell you how much your comments mean to me, unless of course you'd prefer not to have this half psycho blogger contacting you.........LOL

I do have a favor to ask any of you that are willing to pray for me, I have a friend who's son was mysteriously passing out, he would get up in the middle of the night and his wife would find him passed out in the bathroom and stuff...........can you say scary???? I know I would. He went to the dr. Monday, and found out that something is wrong with his heart, evidentally he was born with a heart defect of some sort, and the Parents were told he would outgrow it, now they aren't so sure. So they put Josh on an EKG machine before he left the office, so now on Thursday he starts seeing a cardiologist for a serious of like 6 tests, every other day, so it's going to be a long week or so for my friend. I know as many prayers as we can get would be so appreciated, I mean really come on you all know I'm new at this whole prayer thing...........LOL I'm trying my best though.

Well Hubby and I went to see the attorney yesterday and we have a list of things that we need to get together, including discussing the idea of filing bankruptcy due to all the medical bills that we have, and other debt. UGGGGGG I really hate the thought of that, but it is probably the best thing for ME, especially since I am having the hardest time finding a job. Anyone know of any at home work besides being a demo for a company that is legit?? That way I could still follow my heart and go to school, especially since I know in my heart that now is the right time. It's so strange having a feeling that is so strong, and it's the guiding force behind you practically screaming at you telling you that this is what you have to do. These new feelings that I'm experiencing are so strange to me. All I know though is that I have to have an open heart and I will hear or feel what it is I'm suppose to do. Thank you all for your support. Have a great day.

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Tuesday, December 11, 2007

Hmmm What's up with me??????

Wow.......lets see I don't have a card to post right at the moment, but I have some blabbing to do. I really don't think anyone else reads my blog but a couple of wonderful women, who I love dearly. I hope you know who you are, or if not, you best figure it out.

Here goes.............still no job, signed up for school, have a financial aide meeting Thursday I think, but if no job in 2 weeks school will be a no go for me. I need a job seriously bad..........no education, and not much job experience except with special needs kiddos, doesn't make for a good outlook. Grrrrrr. Hubby can't move out until I have my part of the money situation under control.........:( It's getting harder and harder on the kids, they think because were still in the same house, that this might just all go away. Hmmmmm trying having that conversation over and over........LOL

Next revelation. Kids had their Christmas play on Sat. I bawled by the end..........it was all about forgetting what Christmas is like, and what it truly means. I lost sight of that a long time ago, I don't know when, I guess maybe when the kids got old enough to start asking for the really expensive stuff and the stress just piled on. For the last couple of weeks, I have been having this tugging feeling in my heart, and yes it took me a while to figure out what it was. It was this small little part of my heart, looking for guidance, and direction. Hmmmmmm What on earth is going on??? Well a bit of history about me: I don't know if I ever really understood church/God, I have lost so many people through death, and no one ever really took the time to talk to me about it. From the time I was 8 it seemed like I lost everyone. Then one day when I was about 13, I got a phone call from my mom, telling me that my cousin had been killed, 7 or yrs old, out riding his bike, got run over by a garbage truck. How on earth.........was I suppose to understand that. To me I just didn't get how God could let all these deaths happen, didn't think he was the greatest man ever let me tell you. At 21 after a few more deaths, I lost the one person that I could never have imagined loosing............my grandma. I was pregnant with my 1st child, and I prayed like never before........God I know I've done so many things wrong, but please just this one time listen to my prayers............at least let my grandma live to see the birth of her first Great Grand-daughter. No such luck.......she was an ultrasound, but that was it. I was crushed. Didn't want to go on any more. Just didn't understand. Fast forward about oh lets see........7 yrs........hubby is diagnosed with Melanoma........Oh hell I can't deal with this anymore. People said pray.........LOL who me yeah right. I felt like I was destined to have everyone leave me. Well Luckily someone, a whole lot of someone's prayed because John is still here today after almost 9 long years. A miracle some might say for me, but No not the way I saw it......Now forward to the divorce.........back to that tugging feeling.............Ah hah I went to church on Sunday, and for the first time in my life I think I finally felt something, I listened and I learned........I felt incredible after church. I learned which go ahead and laugh if you want.........that when you spell Christmas with the x (x-mas) your crossing God out of your life........That the word Joy stands for Jesus, others and yourself. Jesus 1st in your life, yourself last and other's in between. Hmmmm still a bit confused after reading a few things, So can anyone tell me why one book says it's ok to ask for God to bless you to ask for what you need, because God has all the answers that your truly looking for if that's what you want or want to hear?? This is all so new to me.........I plan to continue, and am planning on taking the kids with me to the new church that I went to on Sunday. They are all very excited. Now if I can just find my way, and learn to live my life to the fullest with God helping me I will be set. Right?? LOL
I know that this is what has been missing, just as the man at Adult Sunday school said "Everyone is born with a place in their heart for God, but people keep trying to fill up that space with everything else, a boat, a new car, or whatever, but it never feels complete because what your truly missing is the gift of God" Now don't get me wrong I'm not going to become one of those hollier then though type people, but I am going to say this, I truly feel like I have found what has been missing in my life, along with all the other changes that have happened in my life this last couple of months.

I have one thing to ask, please don't comment to me with anything cruel or hurtful, if you have kind words of encouragement, or direction for me, I will gladly accept it, and feel blessed that you took the time to talk to me, but please don't ruin this for me. If it's not for you, just move on. This is my blog, and I can write/say or do whatever it is I may choose, and you can not take that away, I just ask that you be considerate please. Thank you

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